Today is a very difficult day for me as today would have been our first wedding anniversary. Therefore, I would like to take a stroll down memory lane and share memories of this day with you.
On April 27, 2019 I woke up around 5:30AM and sat in the chair that was in my hotel bedroom. Alyssa eventually came in and saw me. She came over and asked what was wrong and I told her that I was nervous about how people would behave. I was very nervous about someone attempting to destroy this day that we made for my future husband since this is the wedding he wanted. She sat with me, talking with me in attempts to calm me down. I eventually had to go take a shower before the hair stylist showed up.
I purposefully chose a thicker black dress to wear because it came recommended that I do not wear a bra on wedding day since I had an off the shoulder wedding dress. Wearing a bra during the day would leave indents in my skin that would show in photos. I was deeply uncomfortable but it was something I had to do.
My mom was the first to show up with Veronica for hair and makeup. Alyssa stayed with me at the hotel and she was prepping hair for Tristie by curling it so that all Tristie had to do was style it. No one would let me help with anything... so I just talked with everyone and drank mimosas. I also had a getting ready playlist that I had going that we were jamming out to. Randy showed up to the hotel room and dropped off my ankle braces that he got me as a wedding gift because I desperately needed new ones. People laughed at my excitement but my ankle braces were going to stick to my dress because they were old and worn out. I was hiding in the bedroom so he did not see me. I had sent him a message early in the morning that said "HAPPY WEDDING DAY" and it had little birdies on it. While we were getting ready, Randy was out at a breakfast with a bunch of the boys.
Our late check out time was 1PM. We barely made it out of there on time. It was a close one! We went to the church where my dress and veil were hanging for me. My dress was top secret. My mom had seen it because she went dress shopping with me and she was my Matron Of Honor (we called her Best Woman) and Alyssa saw it because she steamed it. The rest of my bridal party had not seen the dress at all. I walked into the church to immediately be hit with nonsense. I was close to tears in this ongoing frustration. My amazing sister in law looked at me and said, "what do you need?" and I looked at her and said, "I need you to get pastor Kirk and I need you to stay with me for this discussion so that you can take over if it looks like I'm going to cry. We need to nip this in the bud so that it stops now." Kayla did that for me. She found him and stood by my side.
I then went to put my fake nails on but to my dismay, they wouldn't stay on. It became the first headache. I then switched to a different set of nails that, again, wouldn't stay. My brother went out and got me some krazy glue to maintain it. It worked pretty well but I think some fell off at the reception.
The second issue was the earrings. The earrings were borrowed from Alyssa. She had just worn them at a national pageant where she had won. I was standing in the room, talking with mom when one of them suddenly broke. I have NO idea what happened! we tried to glue them but with no avail! I began crying and asked someone to find Alyssa. I was so afraid of telling her but she came in and insisted that it was not a big deal. In fact, she broke the other to match it and handed them to me to wear. There was a moment when we considered me using the earrings I had for the bridesmaids. because I learned that not 1 but 2 bridesmaids did not have pierced ears. I had converted 1 set but I genuinely did not know that another did not have pierced ears. I was so worried about them being a certain material to not affect some of my bridesmaids with metal allergies that I never thought to ask if everyone had pierced ears. Ultimately, I wore the earrings that were broken off to now look like cluster earrings. Note to future brides- HAVE EARRING BACK UPS!
My mom was the one who had seen my dress and since she was my "best woman", she was helping me to get ready. She helped me step into the dress, zip it up and she tied the bridal belt.
While I was getting ready, I spotted Randy in the courtyard area, getting his grooms' photos done. I stood at the window, watching him. I was mildly afraid of him seeing me but not enough to make me stop. He just looked so handsome.
In the midst of the chaos that continued to unfold, I forgot to put my mother's garter on which was my "something old" and it was borrowed but I was using it as my something old. I forgot to put my lipgloss on. I forgot to have Sam do our prayer circle that she had prepared.
Five minutes before the ceremony, my bridal party finally saw me. They filed into the room and on the count of 3, they all turned around. Their genuine reactions were captured here.
We took a few photos before heading to the sanctuary. When we arrived in that back area, I asked Kayla for my vow book which she accidentally forgot in her purse that was in the fellowship hall. She bolted for it!! She arrived back in time!
Our ceremony was to start at 3PM. At 3:05, my mom said, "Randy isn't in the sanctuary." to which I say, "WHAT?!" But she also didn't say that no one in the party was in there. My brother, Tim, was the best man to my husband. He had stepped in to tell everyone that it was a unplugged ceremony and to therefore shut down all cellphones and cameras. His party filed in shortly after the announcement.
The music started and the processional began.The flower girls and the bridesmaids came in to Canon in D. Randy was asked to turn around before the song began for me. Since I had a cathedral length veil, I didn't want him to see us straightening my dress or veil before the doors opened. When "Heaven Reprise" by The Willis Clan began, the doors opened. I took a deep breath and headed towards my love.
They tapped him and told him to turn around. The look that he gave is the look that everyone dreams of.
This was exactly why I hid my dress. I wanted to ensure a genuine reaction. There were bets on who would cry first. Would it be Randy? Would it be Ashley? Or would it be both.
It was Randy. Randy cried.
Pastor Kirk gave a brief speech on the 4 key parts of a Christian marriage before asking who would give me to be wed to Randy.
The first set of vows we took was what they call an "intent to marry" where Pastor Kirk asked, "Ashley, will you have Randy to be your husband? To live together in holy marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health, forsaking all others be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?" To which I reply, "I will". Randy was asked the same.
Our next set of vows were the standard vows. "In the name of God, I, Ashley, take you Randy to be my husband. To have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."
Our third set of vows were our personal vows. I had told Randy he needed to go first because I didn't want him to hear mine and say, "ditto!" If you know Randy, I think you know that there was a real possibility of him doing that! Randy actually forgot his vow book so the words he spoke were from his heart. I later read the vows in his book and I feel that what he said in the moment were so much better than what he had written. Regardless, they were both beautiful and I love them both.
We then gave each other wedding bands after they were prayed over by pastor Kirk upon receiving them from my brother who safely kept them in his pocket.
"Randy, I give you this ring as a sign of my vow. With all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit."
At this point, we were announced to be husband and wife but there was more to come in our ceremony.
We then assembled our unity cross at the altar table. This was perfect for us because we didn't want a candle that may or may not light and won't really have use in the house. We didn't want sand that someone could knock over. When we discovered the unity cross, it was so perfect and can be displayed in our home forever.
Pastor Kirk gave one last prayer at our wedding which was a blessing to our marriage with the Lord's Prayer.
As much as I hate and struggle with PDA, I finally decided to give in and have the first kiss in front of everyone. I seriously considered having our first kiss to be in private instead. Pastor Kirk knew that it could go either way. We informed him the night before that we would be moving forward with the kiss. He whispered about the kiss in the event that I had changed my mind. Randy knew that this was a struggle for me. I wanted to do what he wanted since this wedding was the wedding that he wanted and ultimately, I knew that this is public first kiss was what he wanted. This wedding was for him. This is the wedding that he wanted and he got everything he wanted- we made sure of it.
After the ceremony, we took a few photos outside before heading into the fellowship hall for our small and short reception. We walked into "Love Me Like You Do" by Ellie Goulding.
This song was immediately followed by "With Love" by Christina Grimmie which was our first dance.
There was a song after which was immediately followed by "Little Girl" by Christina Grimmie which was the song for me to dance with my father to.
My dad gave a speech that really only my family understood. He gave a speech that was full of Michael Stanley song titles. Our family laughed and Randy did too when I whispered to him what it was. Although he didn't know the songs, he knew what was going on.
The next speech was from Alyssa. She took the place of my mom who cannot do public speaking. She gave such a heartfelt speech that it made Randy and I both cry. With her permission, I am going to share her speech!
"Hello everyone! I’m Alyssa, and I’ve known Ashaleigh since 2011. Before I get into how I met our beautiful bride, I want to first thank the bride and groom’s family for throwing this fantastic party! Let’s hear it for the MacDonald and Tye families.
Fun fact about me, I’m a writer and former pageant girl, which is how Ashaleigh and I met. It was 2011 and we competed at the same pageant. Throughout the years we only got closer, and she even came to California when I competed for a national title. Although we live miles apart, Ashaleigh has always managed to support me and be there via phone calls and video chat. Today, I get to return her generosity and I couldn’t be more honored to be part of her and Randy’s special day.
That being said, when Ashaleigh requested I use my talents to write the speech tonight, I was a bit nervous. It wasn’t because of public speaking—thank you pageants—but I wanted to make sure I gave them the tribute they deserve. Ashaleigh and Randy are not a traditional couple—I think we all know that—and I didn’t want this toast to be either; instead I want to use this time to highlight why I believe they are truly perfect for each other.
About two months ago, Ashaleigh texted me. “Please edit my vows! They aren’t right. Something is missing.” We worked together and got them right. Then, a few days ago she messaged me to help with Randy’s, too; however, he decided to wing it. Despite their different approaches, they had the same goal: share their love; and as we heard, they did. I feel like this is the perfect anecdote for their relationship because Ashaleigh is a planner, she encourages their future while Randy can fly by the seat of his pants, and helps them remain in the present. They say opposites attract, and that couldn’t be more true for these two.
But even though they have differences (like their diving techniques and political stances) they do share one very important thing: their support for one another. Randy insisted on driving 5 and a half hours just to see her friend (me) compete; but he didn’t do it just for me, he wanted to understand that part of Ashaleigh’s world. In turn, Ashaleigh has been there through every chemo treatment through Randy’s fight, and together they are kicking its butt. They are two kind-hearted and strong individuals, but together they are a power couple that handles every card life throws at them with intelligence and compassion.
I’m not even a little worried about them, but I do want to share some pieces of advice as they start their lives as man and wife. Remember love is patient, even when they are driving under the speed limit (or above it). Love is kind, even in the midst of marital arguments. Though love is not proud, be proud of each other. Never stop supporting each other, and celebrating your accomplishments big and small. And lastly, never stop striving to love each other “more” “most” and “best.”
I wish you a lifetime of happiness. To the bride and groom!'
My brother (who was the best man) had asked me if I wanted him to be sentimental or his normal asshole self. I told him to be somewhere in the middle because it wouldn't be Tim without being and asshole. His speech was lovely. He spoke about how the previous boys in my life were jerks and how wonderful it was to find someone as wonderful as Randy.
The next song that was played for a purpose was "Cake By The Ocean" which we played for the cake cutting. Unfortunately, our photographers was missing at the time it was playing. We ended up cutting it to an unrelated song.
After all of this, Randy and I were mingling with our guests until we had to head to Promont House for our wedding photos. Promont House is part of the Greater Milford Area Historical Society as this was built in 1865. It was the home of Ohio's 43rd governor John M. Pattison.
I was approached by our photographer saying that someone was protesting going to Promont House and they were suggesting that we do the photos here. I told her absolutely not. Promont House had already been paid for and reserved for us- we were going! The person protesting was Randy's brother. Randy felt the same way and he was annoyed that anyone would continue to pull stunts on our wedding day.
When we got to Promont House, they did some photos with Tim and Randy while awaiting the arrival of others that couldn't "find it" for some reason. We shot photos with the whole group, then with my bridal party before dismissing them to the dinner where we would follow when we were done with our couples photos.
We arrived late to the dinner because of attempts to get the shots we wanted. Our photographers didn't come to the dinner. They didn't fulfill their contractual obligation so the only photos we have from the dinner are dark and from cell phones.
We really enjoyed the dinner at Becca Di Beppo! It was absolutely delicious!
Here are some photos captured by my guests.
Randy had reserved a hotel room for us up in Sharonville but we ultimately decided to go back to our home because we wouldn't arrive to that hotel until after midnight and checkout will be at 10. It seemed like a waste so we stayed home and we slept in. We relaxed and enjoyed our wedding night in the comfort of our own bed. We didn't wake up until 10:30ish the next morning.
This was our final photo that we took that night before heading to bed. I sent it to my snapchat friends with the caption "THAT'S MY HUSBAND!"
It was such a beautiful and wonderful day.
Thank you to all those that helped make it so wonderful for us and helped make Randy's wishes become a reality!
Photography was done by Turner Photography but we do not recommend them
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